This is because when sexual satisfaction is a priority for the couple, the results are reflected in individual well-being and self-awareness.
In case you have more questions or have suggestions on topics you would like to read about, please write to [email protected].
(Read: ‘The dock game’: what is the dangerous sexual practice that generates alert in young people)
- Physical and mental health: you have to work on a healthy lifestyle, good sleeping habits, balanced diet, because if you do not exercise regularly and there is no peace of mind, the pleasure can diminish.
- Knowledge and attitudes: this refers to the education that exists on the subject, which in Colombia is limited and in many cases emasculating. Here we talk about limiting thoughts and what does not allow us to live sexuality freely. Therefore, we must focus on changing what is restrictive for beliefs that allow us to manage sexuality well to understand where the fears come from. and focus the focus on expanding knowledge regarding new techniques and the functioning of the body itself.
- Emotional aspects: the human sexual response is circular because being connected with the couple results in the enjoyment of sexuality. If intimacy is not strengthened in the couple, understanding this as communication and emotionalitythe pleasure will be scarce.
- Have greater wealth in sexual practices: the enemy of passion in a couple is monotony, that is, the sexual script that couples repeat, where there is a very clear routine for months and even years and makes satisfaction less. It is recommended to have an open mind, start reviewing what connects with pleasure, discover multiple ways to give and receive, along with what is innovative.
Consequently, sexual frequency increases and the more sex you have, the more you want this type of encounter.
(Also: Safe and protected sex: how they give pleasure and when to practice each one)
So you can work on shared tastes, in case people are willing to communicate it. The fundamental thing is affinity, because if it does not exist, the four points mentioned cannot be dealt with, as the approaches may be different.
Thus, it is important that those who have relationships are in the same line of tastes, interests, how they see sexuality and how they want to live it.
(More: Six Natural Ways to Improve Men’s Sexual Performance)
Getting out of monotony is opening your mind.
With the above clear, it is recommended to manage the desire individually and review the opportunities for improvement with the couple. For that, assertive sexual communication is necessary. “If they can’t sit down and talk in an open way, it’s going to be very difficult to achieve a goal like reigniting the spark,” says the sexologist.
He also adds that goals should be set, as in other aspects of life. “yesIf you are a couple that has been married for 15 years, and sexuality does not work very well, the first thing I would tell you is: sit down and talk about it, review what can be improved and set some goals“, Explain.
Then comes the initiative and execute. If you don’t have sex on a regular basis and the goal is to have sex once a week or two, take the initiative on both sides, which involves dialogue.
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For that, the founder of Serez Studio says: “Good things are discussed in bed and things to improve are discussed in the dining room“. Which means that when you are in an intimate encounter you have to focus on the positive, talking about what works and what you like, because you are very vulnerable.
On the other hand, with the conversations that have to be had in the dining room, it is advisable to prepare what is going to be said, to have the desired effect. It is best to ask yourself:What is the best way to speak from empathy, from love, achieving what is expected?
However, before getting to those difficult conversations, you have to talk about the good, put on the table what works and expose those topics that are saved.
(Also: Sweden declares sex a sport and launches competition: will the last be the first?)
In the case of women, the most important thing is to recognize the body, because if you do not know what generates pleasure individually, you will not achieve it with another person. “If you don’t know if you’ve had an orgasm or not, it’s because you really haven’t.“, since the experience is so explicit in the body that it would be impossible to ignore it, although it is very subjective according to each woman, it is a release of sexual tension that feels very sectorized in the genitals or in the whole body.
Similarly, when women think that there is something wrong with their bodies for not reaching orgasm through penetration – which is what pornography has sold – it must be understood that the anatomy of the female body is focused on the clitoris.
80 percent of women in the world reach orgasm by external clitoral stimulation. 20 percent or less reach orgasm through penetration. Therefore, understanding our body is necessary before pretending that a partner does.
In case you have more questions or have suggestions on topics you would like to read about, please write to [email protected].
Jimena Delgado
School of multimedia journalism EL TIEMPO
