– It is strange to think about life before the war. Right now it is as if normal times have never existed, Elena Filatova tells TV 2.
It has been eight months since her husband Anton Filatov had to leave her, her son Platon and the home they shared.
The 34-year-old serves in Donbas – on one of the bloodiest battlefields, specifically around the town of Bakhmut in Donetsk county.
The fighting around Bakhmut is so fierce and has lasted so long that the city has been nicknamed “the meat grinder”.
HARD FIGHTING: Ukrainian soldiers fire heavy artillery at Russian positions near Bakhmut in Donetsk Oblast. Photo: Libkos/AP
Paralyzing fear
– I have never felt such fear before, says Elena about the time after her husband left.
– It was like standing on the edge of a cliff and losing your footing. The fear was paralyzing for the first month. But then I realized that I wasn’t going to function if I walked around with such fear.
EVACUATED: Anton and his family sought refuge in Lviv shortly after Russia’s invasion. Later, the father of the family was mobilized for front-line service in the army. Photo: Private
The main reason why she found the strength to overcome her fear is in the living room. Two-year-old Platon puzzles with a toy truck he got for Christmas – a gift from dad.
The two-year-old is too young to understand what war is, but he knows that what his father is doing is important.
– The first thing he asks when he wakes up is if we can send a message to dad. Then we’ll do it, Elena says and smiles at her son.
ACTIVE: Platon makes sure that mum Elena stays active. They hope that dad Anton will be able to come home soon. Photo: Aage Aune / TV 2
– He knows that his father is doing an important job and that he is at work.
With a two-year-old in the house, and constant power cuts as a result of Russian attacks on the infrastructure, there is enough to do for the 32-year-old.
– I probably have 40-50 liters of water here in the apartment in case of new attacks, she says and sighs lightly.
– I try to keep up with things all day, it’s the best way to keep my emotions in check. When I have nothing to do, the dark thoughts creep up.
Stories from the front
Elena admits that she was surprised at first when her husband was mobilized. With a spectacle strength of minus seven, back problems and zero military experience, he was not a typical soldier.
SOLDIER DAD: Anton and Platon before leaving for Donbas. Photo: Private
– Anton himself says that the most dangerous thing he had held in his hands before was a fork.
– He never thought he would be able to shoot, but now he has to – to protect himself and his comrades, she says.
TV 2 has previously written about Anton Filatov, the former film reviewer, and how he uses the time between battles to write down his own and his fellow soldiers’ stories from the front.
Ukrainian Anton (34) at the front: – I had never touched a weapon
– I think writing is a way for him to get a little break from the war, says Elena.
Report from the front
As we talk, Elena’s phone suddenly rings. On the screen, the name “Anton” lights up towards us.
On a rickety line somewhere near Bakhmut, Anton smiles at his family.
The 34-year-old says that it is tough to be away from his wife and son, but that he feels he is doing more good for himself in Donbas at the moment.
– I am helping my family and my country in a better way by being here. The only way to end this terrible war is to fight and work so that we can win, he tells TV 2.
NEW YEAR 2021: The Filatov family celebrates the New Year before the war. Photo: Private
– On the one hand I miss my family, on the other hand I am happy to be here. It’s complicated.
The family motivates
The 34-year-old says that the Russians have made some small progress along the part of the front that his battalion defends.
– But there is really little progress. Maybe 50 metres, he says.
It has come reports that the Russian forces are struggling to obtain enough ammunition, especially artillery.
Filatov says there have been fewer grenade attacks and less shelling from the Russian side in the last month compared to previous months.
NO Ceasefire: This photo was taken in Bakhmut on January 7. The smoke rises into the air after a Russian attack on the city. Photo: Clodagh Kilcoyne/Reuters
He goes on to say that the Russian attacks tend to follow the same pattern.
– It starts with fierce artillery attacks and bombing. When the last bomb is fired, they send their infantry towards our positions, says Filatov.
For Anton, it is the thought of his wife and son that motivates him to continue the fight.
– Once I received a message from Elena that she and Platon were in the shelter because of new attacks against Kyiv. I was so furious, he says.
– It meant that everything I had done here had been in vain. That I had failed to ensure that my family was safe. Every day I think about that message. The idea that they should be able to live a peaceful and normal life is what drives me.
MOTIVATION: Anton primarily fights to keep his family safe. But Kyiv is regularly hit by Russian drone and missile attacks. Photo: Aage Aune/TV 2
Elena thinks it’s strange to think about life before 24 February 2022.
– It is as if normal times never existed. How could life be so good? I try not to think about it, she says.
