Anyone who touches the glittering Oscar groans in shock – the gilded statue weighs 3.5 kilos.

Will Oscar gets is in Hollywood heaven – the pay doubles and the fame lasts forever.

The Oscar Academy (10,000 members from over 80 countries) finally had the courage to nominate popular popcorn hits – instead of just poorly boxed art films that people tend to forget.

11 Oscar nominations for the madcap mayhem comedy Everything Everywhere All at Once.

9 Oscar nominations for the sensational German (!) Netflix anti-war hit “Nothing New in the West” by Edward Berger (52, “Germany 83”)

The 95th Oscars will also rise in Los Angeles

Photo: Jae C Hong/AP

6 Oscar chances for “Top Gun: Maverick” – with the timeless Tom Cruise (60).

4 Oscar chances for the most successful film in the world “Avatar – Part 2” (over 2 billion box office!).

The movie trailer “Avatar: The Way of Water”

When the 23rd Oscars are awarded on March 12th, we will be amazed or smile or groan again.

Oscars for Tom Cruise? Deserved – but too envious hated. Presumably Colin Farrell (46) wins for the Irish friendship tragedy “The Banshees of Inisherin” (worldwide cinema bankruptcy: 30 million) – and 9 nominations.

The “Oscar” is always a big show circus with a party marathon and random victories.

Who won last year? brooding? Best Picture went to the deaf comedy “CODA” (a remake of “Apple”). Really ridiculous, but laughable.

The BILD Oscar goes to “Avatar 2” and Tom Cruise – and of course “Nothing new in the West” (produced by and with Daniel Brühl).

The BILD honorary Oscar goes to cinema king Steven Spielberg (76) for his Jewish autobiographical declaration of love for cinema: “The Fabelmans” (7 nominations). He also gets the honorary bear at the Berlinale.

Steven Spielberg could clean up big

Steven Spielberg could clean up big

Photo: HENRY NICHOLLS/REUTERS

The BILD audience Oscar goes to you – the film fan who still goes to the cinema to be enchanted in the magical darkness. We are Oscars.

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