FOCUS online: After long debates, the federal government has agreed on a self-determination law. Do you like that?
Add Valve: I think that’s a disaster. I myself am very consistent when it comes to gender selection. I have longed for nothing in my life more than clarity.
And I fought for a long time to get this for myself and also for society. Although I was born in a man’s body, I didn’t feel comfortable with it even as a child. For me, nothing is more clearly defined than male and female.
And what are the disadvantages of the new law for you?
Valve: It questions the clarity of my decision or the clarity of my person. It is pretended that one could happily jump back and forth between the sexes. I don’t see it that way at all. For me, adapting was a giant step. Something like this will never happen overnight!
But if you’ve always felt like a woman, gender reassignment is just the last step, right?
Valve: We are talking about a very far-reaching decision that affects all areas of life. The job, the circle of friends, the family. Nothing is left out.
I don’t see that such a decision can be made at the push of a button, and dealing with this decision ad hoc is just as difficult. It’s good to have professional help.
Have you been in therapy?
Valve: Yes, in my time – my gender reassignment surgery was in 2015 – it was a must. I went to a specialist psychologist for two years who was very empathetic.
It had absolutely nothing to do with forced therapy! It was about self-realization, about consolidation. It’s a bad thought if that’s gone in the future. Incidentally, possibly for financial reasons alone.
“I was lucky, I was still a soldier at the time”
What do you mean?
Valve: Well, how the health insurance companies will deal with the new legal situation is not out yet. So far, the matter was clear: with a corresponding medical diagnosis or an expert opinion, one could make use of services. Firstly, the therapy, not to forget the various physical interventions.
May I ask what we are talking about in your case?
Valve: For me, gender reassignment – the cost of the surgery at the time was around 30,000 euros – breast augmentation for 5,000 euros and a flattening of the larynx for 3,000 euros. Who can pay for that out of their own pocket? I was lucky, I was still a soldier at the time.
Thus, the reimbursement of the measures ran through free medical care. And the medical service of the Bundeswehr is known for a comparatively uncomplicated process.
But as far as I know, people with statutory health insurance also received the services without any problems if two reports were submitted and a therapy could be proven. With the classification as a mental illness by the WHO, there was a clear set of rules.
But would you describe yourself as mentally ill?
Valve: I have no problem with that definition. Sometimes I explain it like this: For a while I was in a very vulnerable phase mentally. The Bundeswehr doctor did a great job back then, I think.
He said: I classify you as mentally ill for the time of the transition. When I was through the whole process and came back to him for the examination, he said: you know what, I’ll take the error number out again now. For me, that was exactly the reality.
Federal Minister of Justice Marco Buschmann (FDP) recently commented on the new self-determination law. He praised the project. At the same time, he demands: Possibilities of abuse must be ruled out. What do you say?
Valve: In principle I’m with him, I don’t feel like men when I go to the women’s sauna. However, I don’t see the need to play it up like that. I don’t know what drove the minister to make that statement.
Maybe it’s the current hype of gay influencers who think they have to present themselves as drag queens to make quick money? Well, what can I say.
I think the idea that going into socially protected areas could be done for sensationalism is anything but great. But if something like that really happens, I would assume that these are isolated cases. There are crazy people in every society.
“We both had tears in our eyes”
Marco Buschmann goes even further. He recently clarified that it is not the gender entry in the passport that decides on the protected rooms, but rather the domiciliary rights. The operators of the facilities have the last word. The Minister of Justice said that these could be based on the external appearance of the trans person.
Valve: I had to read that two or three times, I honestly couldn’t believe it at first. So we’re not far from a label. I don’t want to start with the yellow star now… but to put it bluntly: what was pushed there is exclusionary, discriminatory, hurtful and undignified. An incredible setback for people like me!
What is your concern?
Valve: That I could stand at a swimming pool checkout, be scrutinized and then it says: You don’t. In fact, I regularly go to the women’s sauna with my best friend.
She is stunned. Can it really happen that soon we won’t be able to do this anymore? she asked me recently. We both had tears in our eyes.
Have you ever had problems going to the sauna?
Valve: Never. Maybe also because I try to accommodate people a bit when I sense that they are insecure. In general, I am open about my situation and life story.
I can also understand when people look confused when they see me. That doesn’t upset me. I was 50 when I started taking hormones. The earlier the treatment starts, the better the results.
Conversely, this means: my facial features will always remain a bit masculine, and my voice has also remained quite deep. That’s the way it is.
There are also biological women with distinctive features and deep voices, aren’t there?
Valve: On the one hand, that. But I also want to get at something else: Until now, there was something I could have shown in case of doubt, my passport. “Here it is,” I would have said.
Had – you emphasize that.
Valve: Yes, that was all pure fiction. Something that gave security. And now? What does society expect from me in the future? How should I convince others of my femininity? skirt up? Shirt down? Seriously, how silly is that?
You can tell how much she cares about it all…
Valve: … you could say so. And do you know what the worst is? That this new law was made by people who obviously really believe they are doing society and probably us trans people a favour.
The exact opposite is the case! These people probably don’t even realize what they’ve set in motion. In any case, the innovation will definitely not contribute to more social acceptance.
